A look at my other life…
I don’t talk about my “real job” very much. But I had an interesting and very different week from normal this week. So let me tell you about it.
I am a chiropractor. And while most people think of chiropractors as the doctor you see when you have a sore back or a stiff neck, it’s really way more than that. Chiropractic is a science, art and philosophy. A philosophy? What does that mean, exactly?
Without going into exhaustive detail, it means that this profession was founded on principles that remain true to this day:
- The human body has an innate ability to heal itself.
- It can do so perfectly if there is no interference to those systems that the body utilizes for healing.
- Interference can manifest itself as a vertebral subluxation – an impingement of the nerves leading from the spinal cord to all the organs and systems of the body.
- This impingement can occur when the bones of the spine, the vertebra, lose their proper position in relation to their neighbors above and below. Again that is a simplification. The physiological effects are much more complex. But think about it, your brain and spinal cord, the central nervous system, are the primary communication system by which our beautiful brains tell the rest of the body what to do, how to respond and so forth. How can a body heal itself if it can’t get the message from the brain or to the brain from the periphery?
- Chiropractors assist in removing this interference when they adjust the spine, restoring the vertebrae to its proper position.
So obviously, I have a love and reverence for my primary profession. I attended a Continuing Education seminar this week that focused on this “inside-out” principle. I had a wonderful time hanging out with my colleagues, exchanging ideas and sharing stories.
I am rather isolated when it comes to my current practice. It wasn’t always that way, however. After graduation in 1993, I went to work in a busy multi-doctor office and stayed for ten years, until the primary doctor retired. Then I joined another single doctor who wanted to expand his practice and worked there for another ten years. Both of these practices were about an hour away from where I live. The commute started to get old. So at the end of 2013, I walked away. Left the busy office behind and started seeing patients out of my house. The change was a relief. But there were other consequences…
As a solo, small office, taking no insurance, having no staff to supervise…. All good. However, my financial contribution has significantly diminished. Being able to work from home gives you a feeling that you’re not really working at all. It’s weird. And I am not happy with not “pulling my fair share” even though I contribute in other ways. Nevertheless, I have also begun to realize that I am a domestic failure. If I’m home, I take care of the house, right?
Well, truly, there is nothing that makes me more miserable than housework. As a result, the laundry sits in the washing machine until its moldy because I forget I threw a load in. We run out of silverware all the time. The dry cleaning sits in the back of my car because well, that goes right out of my head the minute it hits the trunk. (And wow, I’m totally getting off topic…) But I should be able to handle this, right? What the hell is wrong with me? Maybe I have vertebral subluxation….. Just about the only thing I take joy in is cooking. The rest of it? Meh.
Ok, back on topic. The other out of the ordinary thing I did this week was return to my old practice an hour away. I covered my former colleague’s vacation this week. It was fun and tiring. When you drive an hour each way, have a ten hour day of patients in between, you come home cross-eyed. Oh and by the way? It’s a very physical job. Those of you who see a chiropractor know what I mean. I’m on my feet all day, moving bodies, sometimes big bodies, around to adjust their spines. It requires a lot of exertion on the part of the doctor. I drove home the other night acutely remembering why I gave it up.
And yet…
Yes, I have more free time. Yes, I get to write and blog and interact with you lovely people throughout the day. And I do see a nice group of patients here at the house. But…
Sometimes I feel like I’m not doing anything well. Personally, domestically, privately, professionally… And then I feel like I’m just playing doctor. I don’t know if you all noticed but I even changed the way my name appears when I comment on your posts. It used to read drmegsorick. Now it reads Meg Sorick. Subtle but telling, no?
Noe you point it out it’s obvious. I think we all hate menial tasks… It’s the creative mind. You’re good x
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Simon. I appreciate that! xo
LikeLiked by 1 person
☺ xo
LikeLiked by 1 person
Deep introspection my friend.
Yes, I noticed the name change. When it occured I thought, she is a doctor, but in her heart she is a writer.
As for not doing anything well, I disagree. You are a great blogging friend. You post a wide variety of creative posts. Thus, keeping your posts fresh andf interesting. So, in my book, your blog is a raving success.
But then again, what do I know. I like bananas.
Have a great weekend and don’t be hard on yourself. xoxo
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you Drew. It’s a dilemma for me. I’m having trouble defining myself. I appreciate your friendship and support!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Enjoy life.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I bet the patients you see are very grateful that you are able to help them. When I was pregnant I had an adorable chiropractor. He smelled so good and had to practically lay half his body down on mine to adjust me. It was heaven, lol.
Hugs, my friend. Housework sucks. There is nothing to say there. It just sucks and I hate it! 😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
Haha! Thank you Vic! Yes, I will never develop a love for housework!
LikeLiked by 1 person
By whose standard? Where is it written…
Give yourownself a break. Be thankful you’re not driving a septic tank truck or plucking chickens. Relax, the laundry getting done will not result in world peace.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Mike. That is very true and I thank you.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I think you’re brave and have followed your path. Not everybody does. Hell, in my line of work, I’ll always work for “the man”. You’re doing your thing! Good for you! As for housework? It blows. That is all. 😃
LikeLiked by 1 person
I am having an existential crisis or something. It’s hard to define myself right now. And then I’m like, good lord, get over yourself. First World problems, right? Ugh…
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hey, I totally get questioning ones career moves/choice. I have those panic days, those “Why the fuck did I choose this line of work?”, and the “I can’t do this anymore!” Days a few times a year. In the next week I bet you get an affirmation of some sort, that confirms you’re doin’ the right thing. Breathe. 😃
LikeLiked by 1 person
I hope you’re right. Being overtired doesn’t help and I’m knack erred this week. Plus the well leak thing is still ongoing. Flurgh
LikeLiked by 1 person
I hear ya’. Living in this old place, it’s always something. 😕
LikeLiked by 1 person
Don’t even get me started on the laundry I let go bad in the washer. Although, I like to blame it on humidity and not that I hate going down into the centipede lair where my washer and dryer sit.
You are awesome. And that is all there is to it. I think that any sort of working from home makes you feel that way…I kind of know exactly what you mean.
Don’t forget about all of the things you do that you didn’t even mention here. Volunteering to help others…even if it means sorting out their cable bill (!) is something that not everyone has the patience to handle!!!
Plus you churn out words like nobody’s business!!!
xoxoxo
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re the awesome one. I’m a mess. A childless woman who neither works full time nor volunteers full time nor keeps a good house nor keeps her family happy? I’m wired wrong, methinks
LikeLike
Compulsory retirement caught me on the bounce: employed and wanted on June 30 — a nothing and a nobody on July 1. We rebuild slowly. We readjust (adjustment is good, no?). We learn to create a new world in which we continue to live. We learn new skills and re-develop old ones. Above all, we grow and we (re)find ourselves and our new place(s) in this ever-changing universe. What we should never allow to change is the spirit and the drive that moves us onward and upward … altius, citius, fortius …
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Roger. I am still creating my new world. And I’m not quite comfortable with it yet. As far as the spirit which drives me… It’s been pummeled a little bit, recently. Needs some fortification. I’ll be alright, though. Thank you again, my friend.
LikeLike
Hmmmm interesting…existence is elsewhere Doctor… Where I do not know but elsewhere anyway.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Existence yes, life is something else completely. Existing I have down just fine. Living is another matter. My definition of myself is in flux. It’s difficult
LikeLiked by 1 person
It certainly is…we will have to discuss the philosophy of identity at some point..I apologise for not having re-blogged yet, I promise I will get round to it when I am not working
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m sure that would be interesting. We never really see the world as it is, only as we ‘are’
You are The Night Manager aren’t you?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Are you talking about a metaphorical or a literal Night Manager?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Literal. You’re a spy, I just know it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I am not sure about that
LikeLiked by 1 person
Alright, metaphorical, then.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I like to be elusive.
LikeLiked by 1 person
You know… that kind of thing just makes me want to investigate
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sounds like a tough week. You could always hire house cleaners, I’m sure. I know very few people who enjoy the everyday mundane tasks. I worked from home for a long time so I know what you mean about separating home and work life. I think you are being a little hard on yourself 🙂 you write more on your blog and your books than many people without jobs…me, for instance. You are a wonderful friend and I have no doubt a wonderful chiropractor xoxo
LikeLiked by 1 person
I could hire someone but I feel bad because I really could take care of it myself. I’m actually full of guilt over not working full time. It’s anti productive. Ugh.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Aww, I understand. Many of my friends and family who work have cleaning help. There are only so many hours in the day and you deserve time for you, too! xo
LikeLiked by 1 person
I constantly put off “menial” tasks like housecleaning because I hate it! I’m waiting to hit the lottery so I can just writer all day (been waiting for decades, though *sigh* someday….)
LikeLiked by 1 person
My dream as well. The writing full time but with a meaningful income to justify it would be ideal. I’m with ya on the *sigh*
LikeLiked by 1 person
Meg, I absolutely understand this. It’s hard to enjoy things that drain your energy and don’t feed your soul in the process. I have to restart the dryer three times to get the wrinkles out because I forget clothes are in it.
You are following your gift and that’s why a God made HandiMaids 😜
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ugh, laundry. Ah, the trouble is I have is that I have the time just not the inclination. The writing gives me great satisfaction and joy but I haven’t yet come to grips with spending so much time on something that does not pay off financially. I’ll get past it, I’m sure.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I’ll help! Let’s drink
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m totally coming to visit you some day!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m totally hoping you do! Let’s put our hikers on – go to the mountains and drink wine!
LikeLiked by 1 person
That sounds perfect!
LikeLiked by 1 person
This post was like an ‘Extras’ tab on a DVD.
Great ‘behind the scenes’ footage and good to know something about this other side of you.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m happy you enjoyed it. Glen how do I follow you back?
LikeLike
Just in thought only. I’m standing (that’s standing not lurking) in the shadows with a four star covert ranking.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I truly wish I knew what that meant. I’m glad you stop by and visit me anyway. Thank you.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh Meg, I understand more than you even know. I’ve been unemployed for (too) many months so my home should be spotless and organized and hell, fucking redecorated! Yet I have not done a damn thing to improve this place. I always cook, do dishes, do laundry, get the kids to pick up their stuff… and that’s it…which to me, feels like the minimum. But I can’t seem to motivate myself to do anything more. I just end up sitting on my lazy ass writing… as though that’s ever going to mean anything to anyone but me.
I know what you mean about feeling like a failure. I disagree *completely* that you are a failure in any way, though! You have a career… doesn’t matter how much you work or don’t work. You have a home that’s still standing, no matter if the laundry gets done or not. And you’re a talented, wonderful person. I think the stuff you don’t want to do and the things you feel are very normal. But I still get it… I have no job… I feel like a total failure financially — which affects everyone in my family, not just me, which makes it even worse. And not doing anything of value with the time I have had off? Oh… I get you there! Like I said, I do worthless things that might feel important to me but they’re insignificant. And despite having time to do things I enjoy, I’m not happy… in fact, my anxiety and depression are probably worse than they’ve ever been. What is wrong with this picture.
I totally get it. And I did notice the name change… and I think it’s good to separate the different parts of your life to some extent. And I do see a chiropractor so I understand that, too, and I know I could never do that job! Such a physical job. Plus I hate people and all. LOL.
(Hope I left you with a laugh… love ya!)
LikeLiked by 2 people
The cast iron honesty threaded throughout your post is as refreshing as a summer’s breeze.
LikeLiked by 2 people
You’ve hit the nail on the head. I feel lazy and indulgent for leaving a busy practice behind and neither contributing financially (significantly anyway) nor taking care of things around the house. It punches holes in my already tattered armor. But then I tell myself I’m just whining and I should shut up and change those things I’m unhappy with. But that doesn’t work either because I don’t know what to do.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Exactly. That is exactly what happens! I feel like I’m just a whiner… no one wants to hear it (or cares…) and I need to “just fix it” (like people always seem to tell me… like it’s simple and I’m an F-ing idiot for not fixing it already)… but I have no clue what to do. Even if I get a somewhat specific, concrete suggestion, I can’t do it anyway! Oh… I so so so understand!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh what a pair we are…
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thelma and Louise. Let’s go!
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is probably just a time of hibernation you are going through. Relax and renew and the next bend in the road will appear and you will walk it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you. I appreciate that.
LikeLike
I think chiropractors are God sent. They seem to listen better than other doctors and do their best to make their patients not only feel physically better but educate them to better care for their bodies. I worked for an amazing chiropractor for 8 years and he was one of the best employer I ever had. Patients felt more like family. So I find it is great that you are both an author and a chiropractor.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you! I worked for a chiropractor before I became one so I agree with that! Best boss ever! Inspired me to go to school. The rigors of a busy practice can take a toll on you. I’m still figuring out how to manage a professional life with the rest of it. The crisis will pass, I’m sure.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I know exactly what you mean. I sit at home all day, writing, reading, re-writing, networking, mailing. But hey, I am at home. So make the tea, serve lunch, do the laundry, re-arrange the house. The ‘I’m working’ excuse is met with a roll of the eyes and an exaggerated stare.
It’s commendable how you are managing things – your practice, your writing, and home too. Please don’t worry if sometimes housework gets ignored sometimes. It happens to all working women – whether office-going or work-from-home.
You may not be contributing as much as you would like but let that not take away anything from the list of achievements at all. I’m almost 34 and living off my parents currently. I had a wonderful, high-paying job till last year. I chose to walk away from it. I had contributed significantly when I could and that matters to me and my parents. I’ve finally learned to accept that I don’t have an income right now but that doesn’t take away anything from me. I think it’s the same with you. You may be earning less but that’s what you want and what you chose. You have more meaning in your life thn someone else rolling in wads of cash. You make an impact not just as a doctor but also as a writer. Don’t undervalue your worth. BTW, agree with everything Sandra said. I don’t think you’re a failure at all. In fact, if anything you’ve achieved far more than usual.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Sis. I appreciate that. I have plenty to be grateful for and I need to focus on those things. Once in a while I just have to blow off steam. 😬
LikeLiked by 1 person
Absolutely! I’m glad you did that. Hope you feel better now. Hugs to you.
LikeLiked by 1 person
What a wonderful post. So wonderfully refreshing honest.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Alex. Have a good weekend!
LikeLiked by 1 person
For all of the reasons you state I go to an office every day. Plus I know I wouldn’t be as productive as I could be without the deadlines of actually having other people around seeing you work. My commute alone makes me want to move back to Portland every day so I can completely get how mentally and physically taxing that is.
Know that the people you do help value you tremendously. The readers you make smile and cringe appreciate the flexibility you have with your day job. But life is all about changes and how we roll with them. I think you roll pretty awesome.
LikeLike
Great post! thanks for sharing, Meg.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have thee utmost respect for chiropractors
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much!
LikeLike